3/6/2009 11:29:10 AM

I have a 12 year old son with high functioning autism and I work as a therapist with children with both autism and asperger's. In my experience, I have found that the more you feed into the behaviors and "needs" of the child, the more you are fostering these behaviors. I started very early with my son teaching him that the world will not conform to him, he must learn to cope with the challenges that are caused by his autism such as loud noises, change in routine, strong smells, etc. I did this mostly because when he was young I was a single mom and we had to live our lives. Our routine changed out of necessity and we moved around a lot. At first it was a difficult challenge for him, but before long it became fun to him. He loved new places and was excited to learn new things. He is now mainstreamed and has not had behavior problems at school since he was in the first grade. He makes friends easily and is always making such great progress. He still has some frustation issues, especially with homework but we use coping skills such as deep breathing or taking a walk and he does very well. I can only attribute this to the fact that I have always strived to treat him like a typical child. He receives the same discipline and rules and I expect as much from him as I do anyone else. He is still a work in progress and needs reminders at times, but overall he has done great.
I think it is necessary for teachers to understand that these children require more patience and different learning techniques, but asking these children to follow the same rules and stay on task is a good thing. The more he practices these behaviors the more he will learn them. The same idea applies to the obsession with time. The more he is challenged and practices coping skills and learns to redirect his focus, the more successful he will be not only as a 7 year old, but as a 17 year old. Try not to feed the obsessions. I know it is difficult to put them through the frustration but believe me it is worth it!!! You will see your child grow and mature and life will become so much easier for you and for him.
I have been told that what I was doing is called the "chaos theory". All I can say is that I asked a lot of him and got a lot in return. My philosophy has always been "The world will not revolve around you so you must learn to live in it."

Sherrie Shinn